This blog is dying!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Hello and welcome back to this left for dead blog.  I have had a situation as of late, to adjust my medication to lower it and I no longer have a couple streams of consciousness every now and then.  I am more lucid to explain my thoughts and feelings.  I was buried under 60 milligrams of suppression that saddled me with the equivalent having cement blocks on my shoes.  I could struggle however it would bring me in and down.  The struggle was tiresome many times and I did it in private.  I know the medicine has taken the edge off of me.  I have to find this balance I speak of like my Libra scales always trying to balance in a balancing act.  This is hard for me because I was in it could not really think about it and I thought if I could not feel then I was good.  The more I can feel the more my senses get under attack I tend to lash out.  

I was accused once again for being on drugs and my friends were trashed by numerous people however these people are not friends they are family.  I just want to be happy however I know my value and will not be drug down in negativity or be nagged into submission by women I date.  I am a man an alpha like my brothers we will not give in.  I love being me and I love those family members that even though I can be much or a pain in the proverbial ass love me.  Like one of my sisters said “if I didn’t know you I would hate your cocky ass”.   

I know many will not understand I thought the last girls could have been the ones however they have dropped off after letting their hair down literally.  Not a bad thing just did not like me I guess however I am tired of putting my self-value up for bid with those that do not value or want them.  I need to resuscitate this blog and myself, wake up you damn idiot.  I had a girl on tinder and yes I know everyone’s feelings about that application.  She asked me if I had seen “You are the worst”.  I didn’t know the couple she was talking about, so I watched it and found it speaks to how couples should and should not be and veterans the way we are treated.  Too bad she ghosted me I had so much to talk about on that show. 

I feel great today and hope I feel great tomorrow if I wake up will be good to be alive.  No matter what happens as long as I am alive and wake up.  Enjoy this life no matter what is going on learn from it and grow strength is what I am saying today.  Lets get up and breathe life into this blog and this life.  I hope this helps me and others remember to get better tomorrow. 

#trump2020 #veterans #single #wakeup